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(Images courtesy of Yahoo Movies)

No need for any plot introduction. You’ve watched most of this movie already. This tough-guy-nanny-handles-kids and kids-triumph-over-baddies storyline is so overused it’s surprising no screenwriters have been sued yet. Think The Pacifier and replace some elements with the Home Alone series, complete with a hint of Spy Kids. Then again, if muscle-bound governator Arnie and the Rock have suffered indignity at the hands of pre-teens, why not Jackie Chan?

The Spy Next Door is Chan (The Forbidden Kingdom, Shinjuku Incident) now a geek named Bob Ho. He also happens to be boyfriend of a divorcee (Amber Valetta), who has 3 cute brats (Madeline Carroll, Will Shadley, Alina Foley).

To cut a long story short, the brats don’t like Bob, yet Bob gets to babysit them, evil Russian baddies come after Bob because he turns out to be a really cool spy. Brats see Bob kick some ass and suddenly want him as their father, wedding bells chime, and wait – Bob’s real name isn’t Bob! Surprise, surprise.

The film opens with a series of clips showing Jackie Chan’s stunt performances in various previous movies like The Tuxedo. Sadly, that’s the most exciting fighting scene you’ll see here. Age must finally be catching up with the 55-year-old kungfu superstar, and this movie appears to be his desperate attempt to pave a way into the field of family entertainment to stay on in this industry.

But if you’re not looking for kick-ass action scenes, have an annoying kid you need to please, or simply have too much money, then this film is for you.

Only a young audience will accept the ridiculous clichés thrown at them in the movie. The Russian spies are bumbling, menacing-looking boneheads who will stand still and wait to get shot by the genius kids who can perfectly operate high-tech spy equipment as soon as they lay their grubby hands on them. An intelligent boy who can operate a tracking device definitely knows his way outside his neighbourhood enough to cycle to the dilapidated shack (that may be just somewhere down the street) where Jackie Chan is preparing an ambush for the baddies.

Maybe there’s something emotionally liberating for a child to watch another fellow child hate a grown-up, be spoilt and rotten, and get away with it.

So if you’re 9, you’ll like this movie. Maybe.

UrbanWire rates The Spy Next Door an almost waste of time. 2.5/5.

Photos courtesy of movies.yahoo.com

Release Details:

Opens: Jan 15
Duration
: 94 min
Language
: English
Rating
: PG
Genre
: Action/Comedy
Director
: Brian Levant
Cast
: Jackie Chan, Amber Valletta, George Lopez

The Storyline Hunt

Lim Zhee Yen, January 8, 2010


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(All images courtesy of sina.com.cn)

This movie has taught me to appreciate the finer tastes of ordinary-looking popcorn, after constantly chomping on the snack for almost 2 hours, and its function – to keep you busy in case you end up entering a theatre showing a huge mistake of a movie like The Treasure Hunter, which proves that it might not be worth the effort afterall.

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The film plot tracks the race of a treasure hunt between treasure hunter Jay Chou (Initial D, Secret, Kungfu Dunk) and some weird masked or mummified enemies.

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That is, if you count nightly flirtatious banter and ogling at a woman a “race”. As every hero’s unnecessary must-have beauty accessory, Lin Chi-ling (Red Cliff I & II) dutifully clings onto Jay’s back as they whiz through the desert on a big, bad, black motorcycle, tries desperately to figure out the non-existent chemistry between them, and not-so-surreptitiously seduces the hunter while wiping the day’s grime from her neck. Well, at least she actually does look pretty.

Honestly, there aren’t any competitors – the loser baddies who arrived in a storm vanished, literally, without rhyme or reason from the whole storyline after coming out to punch, kick, and roll in the sand for a while. Jay’s road to the buried treasure couldn’t be any smoother with a babe at his side and foes mysteriously absent.

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The popular singer continues his cool, arrogant hero act here – same few expressions without much improvement – but provides endless scenes for groupies to squeal at. If you’re an action scene lover, there’re a few fight sequences with a mummified human, a Darth Vader sound-a-like, and 4 old bearded spirits.

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Eric Tsang (Bodyguards and Assassins, Perhaps Love) acts as the comic relief character, though it’s probably redundant as this movie seems to be a joke in itself. The veteran reveals the hidden Singaporean in him, spewing his lines in Mandarin, English and Cantonese. Chen Daoming (Infernal Affairs III) is the “emo” guy with a screw loose, who mutters incomprehensibly to himself, and has a potentially powerful background story that was gone to waste.

Now, doesn’t all that just sound promising?

The Treasure Hunter is clearly a movie without any artistic aspirations, only hoping to bank on Jay Chou’s popularity to sell the tickets. Director Kevin Chu (Kungfu Dunk) needs to learn that a few stars carelessly thrown into the movie poster are no longer enough to lure the audience into spending their hard-earned money.

Even if you’re a fan of Jay, take heed to destroy any expectations of the movie you might have, and make sure your arms are full of popcorn, nachos, chips, and every snack you can grab before you walk into the cinema hall.

UrbanWire rates The Treasure Hunter 2/5.

Release Details:
Opens
: Dec 31
Duration
: 106 min
Language
: Mandarin
Rating
: PG
Genre
: Action/Adventure
Director
: Kevin Chu
Cast
: Jay Chou, Lin Chi-ling, Eric Tsang, Chen Daoming


1905: a year of dangerous undercurrents and secret plans, the year of pseudo calm before the revolutionary storm.

A group of underdogs and rebels gather in an attempt to protect Dr. Sun Yat-sen, a well-known assassination target for his revolutionary ideals, who’s stopping by Hong Kong for a meeting with 13 other resistance group leaders under the pretext of visiting his mother.

Sounds like a movie for you action film junkies?

Here’s a piece of advice: don’t go into the cinema expecting Bodyguards and Assassins to be similar to the adrenaline-packed Yip Man film.

But still, there’s more than enough reason for you to part with $7.50 (Singapore dollars) for a weekday/night ticket. The movie boasts of a total of US$23 million (S$32 million) in production costs and a full scale location set (S$8.8 million) of 1905 Hong Kong (as calculated by their official website). Producer Peter Chan Ho-Sun (The Warlords) and director Teddy Chan (The Accidental Spy) even managed to assemble a 12-star lineup.

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(All images courtesy of www.bodyguardsandassassins.com and www.sina.com)

With so many stars in the film, an apparent danger is the lack of engagement between the audience and the characters. Bodyguards and Assassins did fairly well in this aspect of connecting the audience to most of the characters.

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Donnie Yen (Yip Man) plays Shen Chongyang, a money-grubbing, good-for-nothing gambler, whose only merits are – make a guess – superior fighting skills, and a (almost-withered) conscience. With more emotional depth to explore in this character than his previous roles like Pang Yong in Painted Skin (2008), Yen unexpectedly left a deep impression. The ambivalent feelings towards his old flame were compelling, and crying scenes were surprisingly well handled.

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Veteran actor Wang Xueqi (Warriors of Heaven and Earth) gave a stellar performance as Li Yutang – from the somewhat apathetic businessman, to the hesitant leader of the protection plan, to the strict father – every emotion and expression was flawlessly executed. Though the first half of the movie was virtually his solo performance, no complains here.

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Tony Leung Ka-Fai (The Myth) must’ve been a rebel scholar in his past life – he brought out the skin and flesh of his role with ease. Nicholas Tse (Storm Warriors) was a convincing honest and simple rickshaw puller; his acting’s no longer over the top. Hu Jun (Mulan, Red Cliff I & II) was able to show that there was more to the antagonist than just a mindless killing machine.

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Another noteworthy actor is former NBA player Mengke Bateer, who’s Mongolian. His rendition of a smelly tofu hawker is surprisingly natural, and the parody on his basketball player identity during the character’s fighting scenes provided harmless, lighthearted humour to the plot.

It didn’t bode well for the movie, though, when the audience started to chuckle at a supposedly serious character doing a supposedly serious act – which was what happened to Leon Lai’s (Seven Swords) beggar character.

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The audience giggled and snickered through his time on the screen. At his ‘big moment of sacrifice’, he stands ramrod straight on the stone steps, a slight breeze hardly messing up his stiff hair, weapon in hand, with the pose of a kung-fu master ready to face death… and all we could do was laugh.

Lai’s fans can console themselves though, albeit slightly; it probably had less to do with his acting ability than his ridiculous getup and nonsensical back-story. What, pray tell, does a self-pitying, lovesick and suicidal beggar who fell in love with his father’s lover got to do with the theme of the movie?

But that’s as bad as the character backgrounders get. The innocent love between Nicholas Tse and Zhou Yun, who plays a handicapped female, was sweet, and given just enough screen time to create an emotional resonance within the audience. Father-son interaction between Wang Xueqi and Wang Bo-Chieh was wonderfully heartwarming too.

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Action scenes, which were intended as the main attraction in the movie, were left wanting. The parkour sequence by Donnie Yen, and the brawl between him and professional kickboxing champion Cung Le was no doubt first-rate, but seemed a little drawn out, and some fighting scenes were dizzying with too much going on.

However, through a daring decision to cut between the intense action scenes to pay homage to those sacrificed, this brought out the ‘sacrificed anonymous’ topic of the film well without compromising its pace.

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Other minor faults like characters’ makeup, such as Yen the poor gambler showing off perfectly bleached teeth, and costumes, with Eric Tsang (Infernal Affairs I, II & III) looking like he’s cosplaying Mr. Pringles the potato chip mascot, can be ignored if you’re less particular.

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This is a story about the grey areas of a resistance, about the darker side of a normally perceived “good” side, about the deceit and blood that stain a shadowed fragment of revolution.

The secret of Bodyguards and Assassin’s success lies in the meticulous craft which goes into explaining each character’s motive and background and engaging the audience emotionally with not only the main characters, but also many of the supporting roles.

However, a flaw in this picture of sacrifice is the lack of a reason for sacrifice. Many characters in the film don’t even have the slightest clue who Sun Yat-sen is, as they’re set as non-educated, but they all too willingly sacrificed their lives. Too much emphasis on martyrisation led to unwarranted deaths; characters that were painstakingly developed suddenly became blind and thoughtless – cheap offerings to the cause of revolution.

Complaints and regrets aside, this is a must-watch for the amazing acting and grand action sequences (and some laughable characters).

UrbanWire rates Bodyguards and Assassins 3.5/5.

Release Details:

Opens: Dec 18
Duration
: 138 min
Language
: Mandarin
Rating
: PG/Some Violence
Genre
: Action/Drama
Director
: Teddy Chen
Cast
: Donnie Yen, Wang Xueqi, Tony Leung Ka-Fai, Hu Jun, Nicholas Tse, Leon Lai, Eric Tsang, Fan Bingbing, Simon Yam, Wang Bo-Chieh, Li Yu Chun, and Zhou Yun.

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